Today, my dog was gassy as fuck.
He farted so much. He farted everywhere. The living room, the foyer, the kitchen, my mom’s room.
I don’t know what he ate that upset him so much. It could have been his stint in the bin. Or it could be that he’s an asshole and my mom feeds him too many seasonal table scraps.
So I had some wine, and I gotta say, that’s a lot of fruit. Musical fruit.
So I farted in my dog’s face.